the aphrodisiac

Thursday, September 17, 2009

love the unexpected praises (:

i came by to blog about something nice but i realized i am still not done preparing for my lessons tomorrow! So to cut to the chase, i left work insanely late today and was supposed to feel irritable as usual.

But. I read an email from a difficult parent (in the past). And it was an email for praise the first time round. The subject was "Thank you" and the short paragraph goes like this:

"Dear Shirley, would like to say thank you for putting in the effort in making the lessons interesting. Keep up the good work! Heard a few feedback including my own, the children enjoyed going to school. Especially your lesson. :)"

And that made my night.

It came at just the right time when i feel so down and demoralised. It reminded me of the satisfaction in teaching, which i have forgotten amidst all these work load. Let me not think of anything negative at least for the rest of the night. All you nigging negative and unsure thoughts, please stay at the back of my mind! PURR!

Shall go prepare for my lesson again though i'm super lethargic and once again working on my off day Thursday. Night bloggie! I love FatFat! (:

it's 1:20 AM now

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Rant -lowlifes and hair

I feel the need to blog in moments throughout the day now. Whenever i feel a need to share happy things or rant at e usual shenanigans, i think of channelling 'em here.

Which means i would update often but less so with pictures and interesting posts, like how i wanted this blog to be. If you are around long enough, you'd probbaly know that i started this blog to ink happy memories only. Unhappy ones still go to my old blog or i simply keep as draft. But i figured it's a blog still and i rather it be real than a facade of happy fronts (like so many other occasions and people out there).

So a normal Tuesday went by, with me stressing out about working too much and doing thigns too slowly. Starting to get really annoyed with myself :(

But more annoyed with YOU. Not my hairstylist, that will come later. but YOU. and YOU. Stop bootlicking and acting. How do i make myself like someone and try to work happily together when i just dislike him/her? You disgust me. Pfft.

My hairstylist. GRR. I'm beginning to doubt his abilities la. After introducing my friends over and them not liking the outcome. Oh yeah i decided to perm my hair again. Did it on Friday then again today as he didnt do as what i wanted. And today he was telling me to perm my fringe, i thought it was to keep it to the side. BUT i realized it was merely for amusement -.-" It was BOOM like a ball of tangled mess and i almost freaked out. Then he washed and straightened it with the straighener. Like huh? What was the point in that, apart from amusement, and spoiling the condition of my fringe? :( The rest of my hair has gotten drier after my 4 perming sessions in the past year but at least i had my nice fringe. I'm all about the natural 'feel' of my hair :x

Then he had to make it weird too :( Now it's flat after straightening and it's drier than the original state too. Unhappy that it was permed and straightened just for amusement sake. And worried that my hair is going to be horrid after these sessions. Guess i must really look after my locks now.

Alright, don't mind me as i get back to my way too stressful life. Maybe i should just drop out from this line completely. And go cut people's hair for amusement. GAHH.

2 random people commented from nowhere that i'm "gorgeous" and "really pretty". HAH. It's supposed to be a happy day, really. Look at me smiling.

Wonder how long i can last with all these emotions swimming around. Bye bloggie!

it's 1:20 AM now

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Singlish.

And so begins another term of trying to reach work early but failing, trying to leave work on time but leaving only after 8pm each day and being stressed out with the never ending list of things to do.

Somehow it never seems enough no matter how hard i try :( I abhor that i can't seem to do all the work quickly and leave at least by my stipulated time; i just end up leaving work around 8pm with more work on my mind as i get home. Teaching is not easy. Screw you if you think it's just about changing diapers (which is not that easy and fun a task) and talking about apples!

I don't want to be mediocre. I don't want to teach anyhow or repeat a word 100 times for children to memorise and remember. I don't wish to pretend to be nice to the children just so others see it ~~like i honestly think is what you are doing. Please stop your juvenile acts and drama, it's getting on my nerves~~. I want my lesson to be fun and still they learn. I want to put in my all and see the worth in it.

So anyway, i left work at about 9pm (that's more than 12 hours of work, mind you. That's why i have the right to rant. That, and also because this is my blog) and reached home researching more for my lesson tml. Why am i taking so much time to plan 1 day's lesson? It's 3 levels but just a handful of children! *Harrumph.

Oh yeah, i found something interesting in the process of researching on Singapore's culture (relating to the theme this week. i was trying to find out about the traditional costumes and food of our 4 ethic races):

"Nearly everyone in Singapore speaks more than one language, with many people speaking three or four. Most children grow up bilingual from infancy and learn more languages as they grow up. Naturally the presence of other languages (especially various varieties of Malay and of Chinese) has influenced the English of Singapore. The influence is especially apparent in the kind of English that is used informally, which is popularly called Singlish. Singlish is a badge of identity for many Singaporeans.

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Speakers of Singlish will usually end his sentence with a distinctive exclamation. The three most common are ah, lah, ley and what.

Examples:
OK lah, bye bye.
Don't like that lah.
You are going there ah?
No parking lots here, what.
The price is too high for me lah.
And then how many rooms ah?
It is very troublesome ley.
Don't be like that ley!
I'm not at home lah. That's why ah." (extracted from singaporeexpats.com)

HAHAHA. Goodness gracious me! So Singlish has really become OUR language. Like other countries have French, German, Spanish, ... ... we have SINGLISH. And it even has its definition and examples that come along with it on the net. It's like checking out the dictionary for an unknown word and they tell you the context of how it can be used.

So now do you know how to use your 'lahs' and leys' already? Please brush up on 'em as it is our identity and in time to come, tourists might be visiting just to get a 'feel' of our special language. *Shudders*

We are most certainly an unique bunch. Maybe i should tell my kids tomorrow about our local culture and language huh?

Okay LAH. Enough already LOH. I need to go off AH as i'm still hoping to finish watching a dvd Mr boyfriend and i rented but dint manage to finish. I'm still trying to sleep early, mind you AH.

Night world, and Happy 31 Month hon! (:

it's 1:30 AM now

Friday, September 11, 2009

to perm, or not to perm?

So...

to PERM,

or NOT TO PERM...?

I'm not thinking about my old perm from below the ears actually. Not the mid-to-big luscious curls. But the from-top-of-head mid wild curls. Think POOF, and not maggie mee please! Am afraid to turn out looking like an auntie or anything negative like that. Can't decide, yet i'm most probably heading to e salon tml. So much to do, so little time!

it's 2:30 AM now

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

nostalgia/missing the carefree holidays.

AHHH. I am missing this!

I know i look funny (like what a weird posture this girl is having) in this photo but this captures the feeling. I miss going on a holiday; blissful, without a care in the world. I think everything was perfect then.

It's been a hard year. Reality is harsh sometimes. But still we've got to buck up and move on. There's so much on my mind these days and i think i should take some time off to ponder. I want to focus on the important things and the people that matter. I know im such a softie at times and i cant do exactly like what my dear ol' brother says. But i'll think through carefully about my life. It's so precious.

Anyway, you shouldn't start a sentence with But or And. It's lousy sentence structuring.

Okay that was random.

I fell asleep from this point onwards. :/ Woke up 2 hours later and now it's 2am.

Was searching for photos of my past permed hair and current hair as i'm thinking of perming them again. Guess i'm not cut out for blogging these days even though i feel the blogging bug back. 1) lack of time 2) dont know which event to blog about and photos to post. Most of them are up in FB and i feel silly blogging about events that happened long ago. Likemy birthday. And the Bintan Trip part 2 that i never got around to doing. Is it silly? Or you want to read? Hehs.

I've got to quit whinning about work and decide on my plans. Decisions, decisions. Meanwhile, i'm heading out for our little company outing to Sentosa tml! After accompanying Bee and Yin to the salon of course. Shall hope that i have the time to perm my hair (if i decide to) before Term 4 starts.

I know my posts are getting similar and boring! Can't be helped! I can't seem to load Twitter these days too. Sheesh. Shall treasure my non-work days and nights!

Till next time (which i will try to make sooner), Shirley (:

it's 2:15 AM now

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Happy Teachers' Day!

2:21AM.

Happy Teachers' Day! (:

I love the parents who appreciate my/our efforts. Thank you.
I love the children i have had a chance to groom, thank you.
I love to see the growth in the children i have taught and to know that you love me too. It's what makes it all worthwhile.

I'm afraid to lose the passion during this tough period. I'm missing the happiness i feel when simply being with children. I'm pushing myself further as i know this is just the start, and the start is always hard. I can't wait till i get to where it is slightly more familiar. Honestly, i have so much mixed feelings whenever i think about work. It's such a roller coaster ride. One moment i feel positive n yes i can do it then the next... (i probably have mentioned this before).

So i'll give ~~the company~~ myself time. Till the end of this year first. We'll see how it goes.

Shall head to bed soon. Lastly, thank you the children n parents for all the lovely presents. & Thank you to the teachers who have taught me!. Teaching, is not an easy task.

XOXO, Shirley.

it's 11:59 PM now

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